| 2 a.m. randomness |
[May. 4th, 2006|01:42 am] |
WOOHOOO i get out in a little over a week! OUT OF SHERMAN, thank god...
i'm currently applying for various jobs, i really hope that i get one of them.... the big question for me right now is what is going on with next year... will i get in to UT??????????? actually, realistically, i seriously doubt it. but if i don't, no matter. i can make the best of any situation. i will most likely re-apply if i don't get it...but what i am having alot of inner turmoil over...is the question of whether UT is all i think it is and more, or am i just building it up in my mind as some perfect solution? after talking to people, and more people, i really believe that Austin College really just doesn't work for me, fundamentally. I need culture, and sherman doesn't have that, period. the best way i can describe the place is...bland. uninspiring. i need UT, with Austin's art, music, just everything. Culture, and class. i need to get out of here...
i've been writing a little. poems and stuff. i think i could be alot better at it, but my skills are really rusty at the moment. i want to get back into the things i enjoyed when i was younger, that i somehow fell apart from. art, writing, music, reading. i need to read...i feel that i literally have lost some intelligence that i once had-my brain doesn't work at the same critical thinking level. i've grown into the MTV/ ADD generation!! ahhh! how pathetic...
and i'm staying up way too late lately... |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 5th, 2006|10:40 pm] |
ok so i'm in a weird position...like i'm thinking that if i don't get in to UT... I honestly don't know what i'm going to do. I can't imagine myself here three more years, i really can't... it's like i'm waiting to be in the right place so my life can get
started...but the thing is that i don't think chances are looking good for getting in, my transcipt got there late. and even if they do consider my application, they may not accept me, as my gpa has not been stellar and while that is my fault, i should work harder, quit being so self defeating etc., it is partly due to the fact that every day i have a quiet (sometimes louder) voice in my head screaming
I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT HERE
so basically i am trying to keep cool but i feel on the edge of a nervous break down. i don't know how this is going to work out but i just have to keep the best in mind because.... I don't know what I will do otherwise.
i've been thinking maybe my life is just a joke that somebody lost the punchline to and so it keeps going and going.
OK...back to the world outside my head...crash won for best picture and it is needless to say an amazing movie obviously not only in my eyes but in the crazy academy voters.... so go see it?
p.s. i want to be an actress |
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| whoop de freakin do |
[Feb. 24th, 2006|10:06 pm] |
dear livejournal,
haha, gay.
dear people who read this,
i thought i would just do an update for anyone who cares to read! right now life is o.k....i would say on a scale of 1 to 10... its a'ight. so its friday and noooobody's here cause some of my friends are pledging, and others took a trip to dallas (yeah yeah go to my hood without me) and others are just...holed up in their room like the good little antisocial austin college-ites we are. so i have decided, if i could everyday, just alternate my time between doing yoga and watching american idol, i would be one happy girl! if we could just take this whole classes thing out of college it would be pretty sweet. so spring breaks coming....and AC has to be "special" and make ours a month later than everybody elses! way to ruin my life even more austin college!! so haylee is gonna be back but i might only get to see her for a day, if i come that weekend she's here. ooh, megan and sarah get to go see miranda in cali! so fun. i wish i could go somewhere. i plan on doing study abroad by junior year, in LONDON i hope!!
well in other news...sororities and pledging are Annoying.
yours truely,
R8chel
(wouldn't it be annoying if i signed my name like that?) |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 6th, 2005|02:48 am] |
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I am going through a hard time right now, which seem to come along all too often. Why do so many things have to be wrong with me, and the world? Sometimes its seems like nothing will ever get any better. But I guess I have some small hope that it will, thats the only thing that keeps me going at times like these. |
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| damn, this is what i do on a friday night |
[Nov. 4th, 2005|07:40 pm] |
Dawn Summers
81% amorality, 63% passion, 81% spirituality, 72% selflessness |
Dawn is a person driven by her love for her friends and her desire to make a difference. Perhaps you are, too. You're willing to do whatever is necessary to do what is right for those you care about, and sometimes this can get you in a little bit of trouble.
Most of all, however, you have a heart of gold.
Congratulations!
If you enjoyed this test, I would love the feedback! Also, you might want to check out some of my other tests if you're interested in the following:
Nerds, Geeks & Dorks
Professional Wrestling
Love & Sexuality
America/Politics
Thanks Again! -- THE 4-VARIABLE BUFFY PERSONALITY TEST |
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My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
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You scored higher than 93% on morality |
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You scored higher than 45% on repose |
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You scored higher than 86% on spirituality |
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You scored higher than 82% on selflessness |
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| hahahahahaha |
[Oct. 26th, 2005|09:39 pm] |
Bitch-Slap
You are 42% Rational, 14% Extroverted, 57% Brutal, and 42% Arrogant. |
You are the Bitch-Slap, the hallmark response of any abusive husband! You are more intuitive than others, focusing more on feelings than rational explanations, and you are also probably very brutual because you care more about yourself than the well-being of others. As most of us know, brutality combined with emotion often leads to BITCH-SLAPPING, which is why you are called "The Bitch Slap". (This does not mean you are emotional, only that you are more affected by emotions than rationality when making decisions.) Another trait you possess is that you are very humble, which could mean you are insecure because very few people are brutal AND humble. Not only that, but you are also rather introverted, and any tendencies towards brutality you possess may also result from the fact that you bottle up your emotions and don't show them to others until you explode in rage. Most likely, however, you are not a VIOLENT person, just someone who is rather selfish. At any rate, being a bitch-slap does not necessarily mean you will abuse your spouse; it only means you are rather intuitive, uncaring toward others, brutal, introverted, and possibly insecure.
To put it less negatively:
1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.
2. You are more INTROVERTED than extroverted.
3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle.
4. You are more HUMBLE than arrogant.
Compatibility:
Your exact opposite is the Braggart.
Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Schoolyard Bully, the Class Clown, and the Brute.
*
*
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.
The other personality types:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant. |
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My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
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You scored higher than 30% on Rationality |
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You scored higher than 9% on Extroversion |
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You scored higher than 66% on Brutality |
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You scored higher than 43% on Arrogance |
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| Updaty type stuff |
[Oct. 23rd, 2005|08:53 pm] |
I went back to Dallas for the weekend, for homecoming, Friday night was soooo much fun.
I saw everyone, a bunch of alums that were back (claudia, angela, jennifer, kathleen, ray, sean, andy,) and TONY, he got his hair cut, its probably the craziest thing ive ever, he looks completely different.
Lets see.... i met spencers super cool brother, i saw all the band kids, it was so fun seeing them. OH and the best part, at the end mr baldridge asked me to go out and conduct the fight song and i was like 'i don't know....' but everybody was saying rachel do it, so i went out there and conducted with wes, and then i conducted the school song by myself, everybody was cheering for me, and my mom was lookin all proud, she looked like she was about to cry
anyway it was just such a fun night im so glad i went :D
and i helped my sister get ready for homecoming she looked sooooo pretty, she went with christian what a cute couple :) haha
sooooooooo.... more stuff happened but anywayyyyyyyyy...
leave comments :) |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 11th, 2005|12:47 am] |
| Your Brain's Pattern | 
Your brain is always looking for the connections in life.
You always amaze your friends by figuring out things first.
You're also good at connecting people - and often play match maker.
You see the world in fluid, flexible terms. Nothing is black or white. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 9th, 2005|11:25 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sick | ] |
 Independent yet still part of a large community, frogs are unique creatures known for their distinctive sound and ability to hop. As a frog, you spend your days sitting on lily pads or climbing trees, searching for delicious insects to eat. While there are some frogs that aren't exactly cute, you are certainly not one of those! You were almost a: Duckling or a LambYou are least like a: Groundhog or a PuppyCute Animal Test! |
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| new journal entry anyone? |
[Sep. 30th, 2005|10:06 pm] |
Oooh oooh!!! "What is going on in Rachel's life??? I WANT TO KNOW!!!", I hear you say.
Well maybe those are just my multiple personalities talking but in any case...
Classes have been alright. I really enjoy my philosophy and pyschology classes, not so much my economics class. And political science just has alot of material to grasp...
I am also making some great friends that I really enjoy. Of course not as many as I would want, but I'm not that good at meeting new people... I'm trying, but its just hard sometimes. But I would say relatively, I'm pretty happy, compared to how I've been in the past. I don't know... I don't think I'm cut out for adolescence.
I think i'm growing alot as a person by being here.. .at least i hope. just as long as things get better, which they seem to do little by little. because at certain points in my life if it had gotten any worse, i don't know. i have had some really low points. and i don't know why i had to go through so much, but i always just try to stick with the perspective that it all teaches me, and makes me a better person. at least thats the way to think about it if you want to stay sane.
I miss the past still, because even though there are moments i never want to remember, and probably would make me very unhappy if i dwindled on too long, but i have to admit there were so many good times, too many to count.
So...thank you to my friends... without you, I honestly don't know how I would have made it through that awful time we call high school...
Times in band, spent hanging out, girl scouts, and not paying attention in school...making fun of tovar of farrow (hehehhe) good memories. i think laughter is quite a good medecine...
sorry for the disertation, i just wanted to tell ya'll I LOVE YOU!!! you guys are the coolest... i hope i will see everyone soon, at the FAIR (yaaaay) or homecoming or whenever!!! we need to reminesce, my memory isn't what it used to be as i enter old age (hahahahaha)
anyways, yeah! just remember what the beatles said... ummmm.... i love you???
dearly, not queerly.
:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 25th, 2005|06:10 pm] |
| Your Birthdate: July 1 | 
Your birthday suggests that are executive ability and leadership qualities in your makeup.
A birthday on day 1 of any month gives a measure of will power and self-confidence, and very often a rather original approach.
This 1 energy may diminish your ability and desire to handle details, preferring instead to paint with a broad brush.
You may be sensitive, but your feelings stay rather repressed. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 8th, 2005|09:01 pm] |
hello happy people... well i find i am now a full fledged college student. i stay up late, sleep in when possible, and eat pizza alot.
well my classes are pretty much enjoyable, except for the fact ive been sick the past few days, so ive had to suffer through classes. no fun. but today was the first pep band meeting. its only like 20 people, but oh well, im used to that from woodrow. im hoping it will grow though. thats one of the things i would like to help with while i'm here. maybe even a marching band some day. its something to work for. anyway the people in it seem really cool. in fact everyone at austin college is pretty cool, they're pretty friendly and accepting ya know. i mean most people arent so cliquey and all like high school. thank god. thats one thing i won't miss. people being too afraid to talk to other people. after all people are people right? minor differences. except those rabid star wars fans, who are a different race all together. hehehehe just kidding my star wars obsessed friends. :p
anyway i was thinking about if i was gonna rush this year. i was talking to this one girl in a certain sorority and she was like its so awesome you need to do it, and then i asked my roomate about her sorority and she was like yeah they're really stuck up and you have to be like beautiful to get in and they haze you alot and stuff. which is gay. i hate that. anyway even if i'd wanted to get in one like that, which i don't, they wouldn't accept me. its just annoying that even at a friendly place like this there are these stuck up brainwashed no thinking people. whats the point of life? not to make yourself feel better by putting other people down. thats immature.
yeah anyway.
that way just my mini rant.
well i have homework to do. i should start since its due tomarrow, and its like 10:30... lol
i miss ya'll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<3 rachel |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 2nd, 2005|01:48 am] |
1 week. Its been one week, and I'm already sick of the poisonous cafeteria food. Well, I'm gonna go home for the weekend I think cause most everybody is leaving. But whats lame is that we don't even get monday off. but it will be nice just to get away for a couple of days and back home. hopefully there will be people in town and we can hang out.
im taking pyschology, economics, philosophy and political science, all stuff that i'm interested in, just trying to find out what direction i might go in as far as majors and minors and stuff. But i actually really like pyschology alot, especially since i have a real teacher (cough horan sucks... cough)I'm even thinking about majoring in pyschology maybe instead of business, i don't know. i could double major too. i'll figure it out
weeeeeeellllllll, what else... theres this girl named lisa simpson here. we all had to say our names and an intresting fact in CI class, and she was like, "i'm lisa simpson...and thats my interesting fact"
I had my first band practice yesterday, it was cool, all the flutes all really good. The band is small but thats ok cause i'm used to it. Anyway its like 1:51 and i'm not even tired cause i took like a 4 hour nap. cause i have time to do that. cause i'm in college.
awesome |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 28th, 2005|11:21 pm] |
comin to ya live from SHERMAN, TEXAS YO!!!!!
out in the boondocks, thats where the party's at.
doo dooo doooooooo |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 20th, 2005|01:16 pm] |
Well yesterday megan and i got together to see a movie (40 year old virgin, its good, go!) and hang out. She made me laugh (and almost cry) and talk too much which hurt my jaw so i had to take more of my happy pain pills.
it was so awesome to see her though, i love you megan! you are worth the pain. <3 <3 hehehehe
on tuesday some of us are getting together for lunch too, thats gonna be so fun, but its so weird and surreal to say goodbyes. i'm so excited about college though, i just hope it lives up to my expectations. its nice to know though that i can stay in touch so easily with old friends on facebook and i can call them and stuff and my family. i don't know. but what if i don't make alot of friends? and i've not lived in such close quarters with people over an extended period of time.
i'm nervous.
i went to a peace ralley, it was awesome. yaaaaay crazy hippies |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 15th, 2005|02:52 pm] |
Aaaaah tomaarow im going for this consultation thingy for my teeth cause i need to get my wisdom teeth out because my gums hurt where they're supposed to go and they're growing crooked and stuff so they're gonna mess up the rest of my teeth which is bad, or so they tell me.
Anyway... 10 days! 10 days until i'm on my way to learning and knowledge aplenty!
Wells megans left me now too and its so weird with megan AND haylee gone
im really looking forward to alot of the people at college though, all the ones ive met have been pretty awesome... and i hope everyone (from dallas) will be able to get together at christmas at least that'll be fun
anyway i saw the movie "Saw" but it was really confusing cause the disk was scratched and so i had to skip some scenes...so at the end this guy just had his foot chopped off and i was like daaaaaaaaaaaaaang |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 18th, 2005|12:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  ha ha ha | ] |
BAM!!! done read the half blood prince, and one of my predictions turned out to be true, too! it doesn't say prophecy girl on the back of my senior shirt for nothing.
in other news, everything is loverly and my life is perfect! wait no, breaking coverage,
EVERYONE HERE IS A CRAZY PERSON!!
well my mom says i don't act like a daughter, so from now on im not supposed to ask her to take me "ANYWHERE, ANYWHERE" blah blah all because she thinks i don't converse politely enough with her! im trying to finish the frikin HALF BLOOD PRINCE THE BEST BOOK EVER, theres no time for chit chat! what was she thinking! so now "Rachel you can use this house to sleep and eat in but i don't really want to see you i want you to stay in the back of the house...i don't want to see you." and APPARENTLY, i act like more like "a really crappy roomate" than a daughter. WHAT THE HELL is she thinking?????? If she was a roomate not my mother i woulda already slapped her upside the head by now! so apparently shes not just off her rocker, but when she fell off she obtained signifigant brain damage that led to signifigant MENTAL FRIKIN RETARDATION! |
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| haylee |
[Jun. 25th, 2005|01:10 pm] |
haylee left this morning
i can't believe i wont see her until like christmas, i miss her already |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 20th, 2005|01:10 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the bravery! | ] |
Name 20 people you know:
1. emma
2. lizzie
3. my sister
4. nathan
5. bruce
6. sarah
7. haylee
8. mr farrow!!
9. travis
10. megan
11. cripsy (christian)
12. tony
13. catlin
14. LURCH!!
15. ruben
16. ellen
17. cody EARWIN
18. amanda
19. miranda
20. Johnny Depp
Now answer the questions below. . .
-- Who is ..8 going out with?: .... oh god....well i guess his wife...maybe that chinese lady who we told us about when his arm went into her dress thing... SICK
-- Is ..9 a boy or a girl?: travy??? he's a girl
-- Would ..11 and ..2 make a good couple?: hehe, i don't really see that happening, for some reason....lol
-- How about ..18 and ..4?: hmm... i think 18 might kill me if i said yes
-- What grade is ..17 in?: freshman in college. unless his high school diploma was a fake!!
-- When was the last time you talked to ..12? uh today online. stupid dummy. hes gonna be my brother in law! hehe
-- What is ..6's favorite band?: ummm...i dunno! i know she likes like folk music alot cause she goes to kerrville but i think she likes alot of different types of music
-- Does ..5 have any siblings?: a brother
-- Would you ever date..3?: umm i pretty sure thats illegal
-- Would you ever date ..7?: oh, heck yes!!! we're engaged already. call me haylee!! :P
-- What's ..15's last name?: chabez. oh sorry, chaVez
-- What's ..1's middle name?: ooooh...i know it i think! its something pretty sounding, i can't remember
-- What's ..10's fantasy?: oh, duh. To be vanna white and live in her porche and eat starbucks ice cream all day. and also maybe have billy joe live with her in that porche
-- Would ..14 and ..19 HEHEHE AWESOME!!! i think miranda would think lurch is SUPER HOT!!!!
-- What school does ..20 go to?: he's to beautiful for school. plus they couldn't teach him anything, he knows everything already.
-- And ..1: university of british columbia. she goin to UT! i have to go visit emma and catlin down there
-- Tell me a random fact about ..11: uh, we're the same person.
-- And ..3: she got all her good traits from me. and the bad ones....i dunno, from tv
-- Have you ever had a crush on ..16?: oh hells yeah! she was my beautiful prom date!! hehehe
-- Where does ..9 live?: under a bridge. heheh
-- What's ..4's favorite color?: duhh...pink? hehe
-- Would you makeout with ..8?: *throws up her intestines*
-- Are ..5 & ..6 best friends?: nah. but band people always stick together
-- Does ..7 like ..20?: i know she does!!! stay away him haylee!!
-- Does 8 like 19: probably would. he has a disturbing intrest in young girls.
-- How did you meet ..15?: uhhh...sometime between the forward harching and the making fun of huskey
--Does 10 have any pets?: yeah a cat and a couple a stinky dogs. does spencer count too?? hehe...jk
-- Is ..12 older than you?: nope, im older than him by about a month. sucka!!
-- Is ..17 the nicest person alive?: well thats a stretch. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 13th, 2005|05:24 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | creative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | coldplay | ] |
today i went up to the band room to do like 6 hours on my project and then i have to go again tomarrow all day then i will be done with it.....FREEEDOM!!!!
being in there made me a little sad (imagine that)though cause its like its not mine anymore... it belongs to other people now. its weird in there, totally silent, (and everything clean as well, even all those gross stains were cleaned off the carpet...) and you just look around at the place you spent A WHOLE LOT of time in in the past four years, and there are a million memories at once...
the thing that makes it sad i guess it that austin college doesn't have a marching band, so its like that phase of my life(i know that sounds dramatic, but marching band took up a signifigant part of my life for four years, from being just a freshman to working my way up to drum major) is done with. wooow...ill be an octenegarian any day now.
well anyway, then i walked home in the sweltering hot (alomst hotter than orlando bloom) heat, and watched the results of the jacko trial.
You Are 40% Normal
(Somewhat Normal)
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While some of your behavior is quite normal...
Other things you do are downright strange
You've got a little of your freak going on
But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself |
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tabularasa_1987's journal
